A Joke a day..

[carmangary]

My reactor has a first name, it's N A V A L.
My reactor has a second name, it's classified as hell.
Oh, I love to SCRAM it, every day,
And if you ask me why I'll saaaaaaaaay....
'Cause radiation has a way of FUCKING up your D N A.

I remember that... I think I first heard it at prototype.

Did you hear about the meaning of SCRAM? The first experimental reactors had a single control rod held by a rope on a pulley. Some of the engineers would slowly pull the rope. In case of an emergency, a man was standing by with an axe: The Safety Control Rod Axe Man.

[steve-o]

That axe guy could also be called the Stupid Char Remaining After the Meltdown..

[frank_1257]

This past year I was riding a public express bus home from downtown to the outskirts of Austin, Texas there were 3 other passengers and the driver.

As we were about to start the nonstop stretch of the bus trip we were struck from the rear on the inside turning radius.

We stopped and an arabic man vehemently stated that our bus driver was somehow at fault defying the laws of physics.

The bus driver radioed for a service wrecker from the public transport comany.

A short time later an arabic appearing woman showed up taking pictures I assumed a wealthy arabic man had called his attorney and auto insurer.

After this a man showed up in a greasy old 1970's holey steeler's T-shirt.

I watched and heard him cancel (call off) the arrival of the Austin Police Department to the Accident scene, by a VHF radio.

Soon a large wrecker arrived from the transport company. I watched the man in the steelers shirt ask the wrecker driver if he did his own bus repairs in house. He asked him if he would accept a check (LATER REALISED US Govrnment) for $50,000 for damages to the bus.

Well between some bum appearing man canceling a police response to a accident scene , and a $50k offer to make the accident just go away? I was really perplexed!

Now he enters the bus and forcibly moves the other 3 female passengers to the furthest possible seperation between each and me to apparently get each persons stories.

Well now #4 it's my turn, I am asked if I have suffered any injury that I would file report of or that would require filing of my injuries if any or the accident event.

I say " Wait a second who the hell are you to be so agressivelly questioning me, are you an attorney or insurance agent for the man who hit the bus?"

Well out comes a Homeland Security Badge.

I answered questions and said NO I was not injured.

No info was given, about his actions to me or anyone?.

As best as I can guess the man who hit us was a member of some arabic church or group and was a mole and the US government acted to suppress his real identity of some apparent idiot, agent paid spy!

This is where our tax dollars are being spent to pay some stupid idiot to spy on his peers.

????????????????????????????????????

[buffo]

Did you hear about the meaning of SCRAM? The first experimental reactors had a single control rod held by a rope on a pulley. Some of the engineers would slowly pull the rope. In case of an emergency, a man was standing by with an axe: The Safety Control Rod Axe Man.

The first reactor actually had three control rods, but the one that had the most reactivity really was tied off with a rope, and yeah, there was a guy standing there with a sharp axe ready to cut it if need be.

Nonetheless, "SCRAM" is probably a backronym. I've heard "Start Cutting, Right Away Man" and "Safety Cut Rope Axe Man" before as well. Wikipedia has a pretty good rundown of the entymology of the term, but according to the sources listed the term was in use long before the acronym was explained. (Thus a backronym.) Too bad, really, because it makes a hell of a story...

Have you heard about the origins of the word "crud" as it applies to nuclear reactors? That one is 100% legit. Yup. "Chalk River Unidentified Deposits." Crazy...

Adam

[Stuka]

Poems?

I know some poems ! (Thank-you, Dice Man!)
***********************************

Little Miss Muffett, sat on a tuffett,
eating here curds and whey.
When along came a spider, sat down beside her.....
..and said, "Hey, bitch, what's in the bowl?


There was an old women that lived in a shoe;
She had so many children her uterus fell out....


Ruth and Johnny, side by side,
went out for an auto ride.
They hit a bump...Ruth hit a tree.
And Johnny kept going, ruthlessly....

[Insanity]

Mary had a little lamb
She also had a bear
I often saw her little lamb
But I never saw her bare

[keeperx]

Mary had a little lamb,
the lamb it had no hair,
and everywhere that Mary went,
She liked to ride it bare... that diseased little whore..

[colouredmirrorball]

Just found these on Youtube
Don't know if anybody here already saw them, but I like their form of humour...

http://nl.youtube.com/watch?v=AYxu_MQSTTY

and watch also part 2 & 3

[stanwax]

I tell you what - hes far better and more watchable than David Blaine

Rob

[Insanity]

Thought this one was great...

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=mqKWay-_3bk

Mark