Privacy Policy

Otherwise known as: "Everyone has a price: It's not a matter of how much, but what currency."

Under no circumstances will we sell, trade, or give away your personal information.

Unless someone or corporation pays us $250,000,000 in US currency or irrevocable bearer bonds issued on a Swiss bank that will be delivered to the private island that will also be required as part of the buyout.

At that point: Ohh yea. Your personal information is getting sold off big time. I'm sure you completely understand. Don't worry though, I'll invite you over sometime.

I think I will name the island "Laseria". And don't cut corners on the island either ya'skinflint. It needs to have an inactive volcano with subterranean "Evil Genius" style compound containing no less than 100 slave-laborers in identical black jumpsuits to mindlessly do my bidding. A 500MW pebble-bed nuclear reactor is a plus, though I might settle for 250MW. Depends on the Laser laboratory, obviously.

In addition I will also require a room cut into the mountain no less than 50,000 square feet with a reinforced bank vault door . The sign on this door must read "Capacitor bank #5". While your at it: construct 4 more and fill them with capacitors. Think Sandia Z-machine and NIF combined.

And god help you if it the 47 room Chateau doesn't have Air-Conditioning.

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This document is subject to change as I might want a lot more money.

Seriously though: I'll get a real privacy policy up one day, but till then: I think this about covers it.